Im not sure what you’re referring to with the men policing men and women policing women bit. Misogyny is perpetuated by everyone, not exclusively women.
And you’re right the problems of toxic masculinity are important to talk about, a lot of those problems are themselves indirectly related to misogyny. “Painting your nails is girly and therefore wrong” only works if we presuppose that being girly is lesser and wrong. Theres much more to toxic masculinity than just that of course, but a lot reinforces misogyny or is built upon it.