Toes, Lookup “colon cleansing”.
Atin, Mainline dysentery infected blood
match, 
We found the villain to the no-poop-for-three-days story
Chee_Koala, Eat a large bucket of KFC and try your hardest? I love chicken rolled in bread -> deepfried as much as the next sane earthican, but man does my digestive system hate it with a furious burning passie.
prowess2956, Who are you try to make shit themself while in / over international waters?
DocMcStuffin, 
Not sure if they’re still available, but gummy bears made with Lycasin guarantee explosive results.
lemmefixdat4u, Sandwich bag full of shit placed in your shorts 2-6 hours from now. Then sit down firmly.
Or talk to the homeless guy in Walmart. He seems to have this one down pat.
nudnyekscentryk, 
Prunes or, more hardcore, sorbitol candy.
henfredemars, Cleansing tea from the local Asian Mart.
Buckle up brother. Hope you don’t got plans later today.
Aremel, Magnesium citrate. Take it a few minutes before you actually need to.
eezeebee, 
Eat a big bowl of oatmeal now, then have a coffee 2 minutes before showtime.
over_clox, Just relax homie, you got this. 💩
Sendpicsofsandwiches, 
Milk of magnesia. You can get it at basically any drug store and it will make you fucking BLAST.
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