DillyDaily

@DillyDaily@lemmy.world

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DillyDaily,

You do anyway without piercings.

The nipple isn’t technically one hole, it’s kind of like a porous sponge. After all, mammary glands are just mutated sweat glands, it’s a series of holes connected to a series of ducts.

So a lot of people find when lactating that it can spurt in crazy directions from unexpected parts of the nipple.

DillyDaily,

Nah, I’m just a person with leaky tits.

DillyDaily,

The number of times I find myself plugging the iron in behind the TV and then holding an old Amazon box against the wall and juggling my pants while I iron because I’m in a rush and that’s the available outlet plug and space.

DillyDaily,

The female condom has two rigid rings, one in the sealed end that sits under the cervix, and one at the open end.

The ring at the open end is designed to hold the condom open and give the penetrating partner a nice big safe target to make sure the penis/toy/whatever goes inside the condom and not accidentally between the condom and the vaginal wall. This ring also provides some minor protection to parts of the vulva due to its size.

The internal ring is much smaller by comparison, and is not that much larger than a diva cup. The internal ring of a female condom is a similar size to a “soft cup” menstrual cup, it’s a little bit smaller than a contraceptive diaphragm.

DillyDaily,

Yeah, nah, Tamworth. We have our own branches of country music down here mate.

Blak Country is a seriously cool branch to explore if you’re curious about how Australia has interpreted US country music into a localised sub-genre. Swap your mouth organs for a gum leaf and add some yidaki riffs for extra bass.

DillyDaily,

Food I cook is starting to taste more and more like my mother’s cooking. Moving out of home I always assumed my mums poor cooking was down to technique, boiling the brussel sprouts, steaming the peas until they were grey, water frying everything. As soon as I learned to cook properly it was amazing how much flavour everything had. Letting things brown fully, using oil, not overcooking everything.

But recently, no amount of skill can save the sad veggies sold in store.

It makes the hyperprocessed foods even more appealing when there’s nothing you can affordably do to improve the simple produce and staples. When potatos cost the same as Pringle’s, calorie for calorie (and they do, https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/43ec2753-f085-435f-92a0-40a67df31a87.jpeg) it’s easy to see why “just eat beans, rice, and in season produce” isn’t helpful advice - yes it’s frugal, but it’s depressing, and not as easy as it used to be. Why waste money on already rotting food that tastes bland when the same money can buy me a more nutrient dense food that lasts longer and tastes better?

I’ve got a few things growing on the 2m concrete slab my landlord calls a back yard, it helps having home grown spring onion, parsley and pea shoots to dress up a dish.

I’m a terrible gardener, I can’t even get mint to take. “grow your own” is thrown around too readily when people complain about produce quality. It’s not always an option, there is a physical skill, a cognitive skill, and resource requirements.

DillyDaily,

In Australia we call this “skimpflation” because they aren’t shrinking the final product, they’re skimping on ingredients to lower production costs.

It’s the bane of my existence because brands I know and love will change their ingredients without warning and without changing anything on the packaging (sometimes not even changing the ingredients list! If the ingredients list has always just said “starch” they don’t have to change anything going from arrowroot starch to cheaper potato starch)

I have allergies and I’ve bought two boxes of the same product at the same time, and had an allergic reaction to one, but not the other.

I used to always blame it on my housemates not washing the cooking utensils properly, but I now use separate cooking equipment and I clean down the kitchen before I start and cook at odd times so I’m the only one using the kitchen.

I’ve started emailing companies after my allergic reactions to determine if they have changed an ingredient, and 90% of the time they confirm they have changed the ingredients. Usually they put some PR spin on it about the new ingredient being more allergy friendly or sustainable (they don’t clarify “environmentally” so I assume they mean “financially sustainable for the profits of our company”)

DillyDaily,

I mean, given what’s happening with the women’s only art exhibit at the MONA right now, this woman definitely has a legal leg to stand on even with this being a private company.

Even if it’s just a matter of false advertising (if the app means cis women they should say cis women, not say “women” and then go out of their to exclude an entire group of women) or compensation for being given access then having access removed.

DillyDaily,

How does that even work?

I mean, to be a cis lesbian also implies being a cis woman…

DillyDaily,

If you’re a private entity and there is a specific reason that having non-black people in the group would be detrimental to the purpose of the group, yes, in Australia you can make a black only space.

For example, if you want to create a support group for POC to discuss trauma around being subjected to racism, to ensure you create a safe space, making the space POC only is not only legal, but often the more ethical choice for this group.

Want to create a social and dating app for queer women to meet other queer women? What purpose would it serve to let straight people into that group?

There is difference between public spaces, that must allow access and entry to all, and a private organisation that caters to specific demographics, and being freely open would completely defeat the purpose of the private organisations goals.

I’m not an alcoholic, I don’t personally know anyone who has struggled with alcoholism. Why can’t I go to an AA meeting to talk about my feelings on alcoholism? Obviously, Because that’s not helpful, it has the potential to be harmful to the people who attend because they have lived experiences with alcoholism. I could argue I’m being discriminated against because of my medical history, but I’m not being discriminated against, I’m just not being catered to, because I don’t have an unmet need in this specific situation.

DillyDaily,

I’m not trying to be rude, I’m trying to understand.

As far as the language is concerned, I’m just trying to understand how a trans woman could be a cis lesbian, when my understanding is that being cis and being trans are mutually exclusive.

Am I missing something?

DillyDaily,

Again, it depends on the purpose of the group you’re creating, does this person in question face discrimination for their perceived race? Then a support group for people who have faced discrimination for their race may be the right place for them, assuming the intersection of having “chosen” to present as a race they’re not doesn’t create an unsafe space for the other group participants.

However if your group is for people who have grown up POC or been raised in a non-dominant cultural group to discuss shared experiences, then obviously someone who identifies as POC later in life would not be served by that group, so would not be eligibile to join that group.

There are circumstances when even if you fit the criteria of the group, you may still be excluded due to the way various identities and experiences intersect, or because your personal actions are not serving the group.

It’s not discrimination to be told you can’t use a private service because the service can’t serve your specific needs, and your personal circumstances reduce the groups ability to serve its other members.

DillyDaily, (edited )

I also hate cooking, but I’m broke and vegetarian.

1lbs of dried chick peas goes in my housemates pressure cooker on Sunday, and 12 servings of chickpeas gets scooped into ziplock bags and thrown in the fridge and freezer for the rest of the week.

On top of rice with a bag of microwave steam veg, stirred into a premade curry, blended and served on top of pasta like a weird hummus alfredo, thrown into a Quesadilla (side note, what’s a Quesadilla without cheese called?), smashed on top of toast and covered in whatever condiment I have. Or more realistically, I toss some salt in the zip lock bag and just eat out of the bag with a spoon while staring into the fridge wondering what I’m going to make for dinner, before grabbing a slightly limp carrot and an almost empty jar of peanut butter I left out instead of throwing away and telling myself “this is a balanced choice, protein, carbs, fats, a vegetable…”

Rice gets a similar treatment to the chickpeas, a big batch in the rice cooker on Sunday, divvied up and frozen for quick and cheap rice during the week without having to cook it from scratch after work. We don’t have “minute rice” or parboiled rice in my country, and the “microwave pouch” rice doesn’t fit in my budget.

DillyDaily,

The sauce packet is usually kecap manis, it’s an Indonesian sweet soy, so your guess was pretty accurate.

DillyDaily,

I’m certain you understand, you are intoxicated, departing from the entertainment establishment before it closes, and you are responsible so you take it’s upon yourself to secure safe, sober transport home. The application you use to order the ride informs you that your designated driver will arrive in a “Kia Chevy Juke”. Despite being absolutely incapable of clear thought, you, or another member of your party is trying very hard to ensure you all enter the correct vehicle to avoid potential danger from nefarious individuals. Also, you have chosen to partake in this activity in a cold time of year, and as it is 4 o’clock in the morning, you are all quite cold.

DillyDaily,

This is why they are also tell you the license plate number.

I don’t need to know what a Honda Whatever looks like to know that if the licence plate and my app both say “ABC123”, that’s my uber.

My uber is a white Toyota camry? So helpful, there definitely aren’t 7 of them parked outside the club each waiting for their uber rider and or kidnap victim.

DillyDaily,

Sounds like Dr Gunther von Hagen’s, he invented a the plastination method of tissue preservation that’s used in countless medical and anatomy training schools across the globe.

He had a series on BBC/Chanel 4 as part of his “Body Worlds” exhibits and that’s all over YouTube, as part of promotion for the new technique that let him preserve entire intact body systems. Fascinating stuff if you’re into general anatomical studies, or just body horror

The source of some of his older anatomical specimens is… Controversial

BBC 4 has a bunch of autopsy videos floating around on YouTube. I vaguely remember the one with the blonde doctor from supersize vs superskinny dissecting a smokers lungs and a morbidly obese heart, and an alcoholics liver.

DillyDaily,

Or just broadly financially literate people. I only make $34k AUD.

I’m incredibly fortunate that my parents were able to teach me financial literacy. I’m also incredibly lucky that I have the personality type to be happy “slumming it”, almost taking a sick pride in how far I can make a 50c bar of soap stretch to clean my entire body, house and laundry, so living within my means has been possible even when my means is a couch in a 4 bedroom share house with 10 roommates. (some of the best years of my life, which is far from the usual sharehouse experience)

Because of a congenial illness, my start in the work force was delayed and is still partly inhibited. But I made a point to put a bare minimum of $20 from every pay cheque straight into a term deposit that I couldn’t touch. When it hit $1000, it moved into a more accessible emergency account, and began saving up the term deposit again. When things are easy I bump that savings contribution up as much as I can. The emergency fund is now a comfortable 5k, with another 10k in the term deposit, that’s 15 years years of savings. The only reason it’s as much as it is, is because I’ve been incredibly lucky to have very few genuine emergencies that require immediate payment. If I can put an unexpected expense on a payment plan, I do.

There are “emergencies” I have ignored because the cost wasn’t worth it. I’ve had 9 teeth extracted, I probably could have saved them all if I forked out a few thousand for a root canal, but it made more financial sense to just let them get bad enough that I could get them extracted for free at the dental school, since now I will never have to worry about those teeth them (I’ll only have to worry about jaw bone loss).

I’m lucky that I never had to get involved with credit card debt. I didn’t have “the bank of mum and dad”, but between my 60 cousins and 20 friends, I can borrow $10-20 from everyone to cover something big, and pay it back slowly interest free, and I make sure I do the same for them, it’s only $20 after all. I relied on that a lot when I was young and still building my emergency fund, and that’s certainly a privilege not everyone has.

I’m privileged to be financially educated and have a social safety net, but by the living standards set by my country, I’m far from wealthy.

DillyDaily,

Can you explain how the pill and IUD are out?

The combined oral contraceptive pill suppresses ovulation, there’s nothing to conceive with.

Copper IUDs denature the head of the sperm, meaning they are no longer able to fertilise an egg.

In both instances, there’s either a no egg, or no viable sperm. It’s no different to having sex while infertile (is that a crime too? Because if it is I’d like to see them try and stop me)

I can see how the pill could end up on the chopping block, as it’s secondary method of action is to prevent the uterine lining thickening enough to support implantation of a fertilised egg, but copper IUDs prevent contraception, so life never begins, and thus nothing is “murdered”

DillyDaily,

Ah thank you, I was using too much logic and failed to remember that misogynistic laws aren’t made from a position of reason.

DillyDaily,

The title of this article really confused me because I’ve never hard of this company before.

I thought ol’ mate migaloo (the albino Humpback whale) was swimming around fucking up super superyachts.

DillyDaily,

Disassociation maybe?

I used to think my hearing loss and visual impairment was the reason I got so stressed walking through a car park - I can’t hear cars and I can’t always tell if a slow moving car is indeed moving.

But that made no sense because I have no issues getting around a bus depot and public transport interchange. I’ll be fine navigating the streets with buses, trams, bikes and pedestrians, but as soon as I step into the parking lot I suddenly can’t detect obstacles properly.

My partner pointed out thatI very clearly dissociate when I’m in a car park. I’ve conditioned myself to feel anxious in car parks (from when I was younger before I learned to navigate with my disability, the fear of car parks did not make sense) so now I pre-emptively check out and try to navigate on autopilot, which makes it more dangerous and anxiety inducing, making me dissociate more.

As soon as I realised that I was dissociating and that was the problem, I started working on it and now I have no greater level of disorientation in a car park than anywhere else.

DillyDaily,

I had read so many comments on line about how intensely painful gallstone are, and how that pain is no joke.

I was in my second year of nursing school and the chronic niggling abdominal pain I’d had for several months changed in an instant to the most crippling colicky pain I had ever felt. I swear it radiated throughout my entire body. The way it “gripped” in my entire torso made me feel like my heart was seizing, but it was just my gallbladder full of stones.

I knew immediately what it was. I’d been ignoring the niggling pain because I had stage 4 endometriosis at the time so abdominal pain wasn’t unusual. And it’s a common phenomenon for medical students and nursing students to experience strange pshycogenic symptoms, especially as they learn about a new disease, and the niggling pain had started around the same time I was doing my unit on biliary and hepatic anatomy and physiology, so when my gallbladder was “grumbling” I just assumed I was imagining it.

I booked into my GP, who instantly agreed it sounded like gallstones, she ordered an ultrasound and liver function test. My gallbladder was full of stones, most were tiny, 2-3mm, but there were 4 chonky bois, and my Liver function test was all sorts of abnormal.

Up until this point, everyone had treated this very seriously. My GP was rushing around like it was urgent, when I told my teachers at nursing school that I’ll likely need time off because I was dealing with gallstones they all acted like it was a catagory 2 emergency, and everyone had this assumption that in less than 2 months I’d be gallbladder-less.

I was referred for surgery. That was April, I got my intake letter and my surgery was scheduled for October.

So I spent the next 6 months in occasional agony. I was lucky that I’d get a solid 3-4 days without pain, and then I’d get an “attack” that would last a few hours but fade out.

But as it got closer to October, the attacks were lasting over 2 days, by the end I was delirious. I went to the ER twice out of desperation. Both times they gave me buscopan and told me to go home and wait for my surgery. My GP prescribed me some muscle relaxants which helped a bit.

On the night before my surgery, I was having the worse pain of the whole ordeal by far. I was fasting for surgery so I couldn’t take the pain relief my GP had prescribed because it was an oral tablet. I wasn’t getting any sleep, so I just went to the hospital at 2am (instead of 8am for my surgery).

I went to the ER and explained that my surgery was in the morning, I’m fasting so can’t take my meds, but the pain is unbearable. They gave me, you guessed it, buscopan. I sat in the waiting room and at 7:45am said goodbye and walked over to the day surgery wing.

Everyone I told was baffled, saying gallstones were so incredibly painful there’s no way I’d have to wait that long for surgery and not get proper pain relief while I waited. Even my GP was confused, I saw her once a fortnight between August and October because I was just in such a sorry state. My skin was yellow, I was shitting clay, I couldn’t keep much food down, I’d lost a lot of weight. My GP would spend most of the appointment on the phone with the surgical intake team asking “what the fuck?”

But 9 years after my surgery, my best friend started getting gallbladder attacks. She went to the ER, they confirmed the stones with an ultrasound, and they referred her for surgery. 2 months later she still hadn’t gotten her intake letter, so when she had another bad attack she went to the ER and they gave her buscopan and advil and told her to be patient, the surgical list is backed up. She got her letter a few days after that, surgery was booked for August.

She scrounged together some money to see a private surgeon, she saw him on February 10th, and she had her gallbladder removed on February 15th, and they sent her home with endone for the 5 days between. It took a chunk out of the savings that she and her partner want to use for a house deposit, but there’s no way she could have made it to August with how much pain she was in.

DillyDaily,

Thank you!

I’ve had bike acid diarrhoea/malabsorbtion (BAM) almost every day since my surgery and my GP has said it’s to be expected because I had inflammatory bowel disease and my deodeunum is the most effected so it’s the reason I get gastric motility issues (some days I get gastric dumping, some days I have gastroparesis)

My doctor has just been changing my immunosuppression therapy trying to find the formulation and dose to reduce my BAM.

But it sounds like I need something to bind or neutralise the bile in addition to treating the IBD. I can’t believe my GP never suggested it, I’m definitely going to be asking if it’s worth trying.

DillyDaily,

As someone with chronic idiopathic hyperemesis, this is a mood.

I vomit too often and for too long to find anything zen about it. I spend the entire time heaving anxiously worrying over the state of my tooth enamel and trying to remember if I ate beets or chocolate last night to explain that colour or if I need to call an ambulance.

I vomit while using my phone. I’ll play a podcast, video, music, etc

If I’m going to be heaving for 20 minutes 2-4 times a day every day for a few months, I’m not doing it in silence with my own thoughts.

I’ve been dealing with this on and off for about 7 years now, twice a year I’ll just have a 1-2 months straight where I can’t keep anything down, not even water unless I’m vigilant about stretching out my water intake over a whole day one tiny sip at a time. Then just as suddenly as it starts, one day I’ll wake up and I just magically won’t feel nauseous, and it’s like I was never even sick!

Because it goes away on its own I’ve never been able to get to the bottom of it. When it starts happening, I book in with a doctor, by the time I finally see the doctor, the “flare up” has passed and any tests the doctor runs when I’m not sick are always normal. So doctors will just blame my migraine disorder for it, and move on. I recently learned about Cyclic Vomiting Syndrome so that’s something I’m going to be talking to my doctor about when I see him next.

DillyDaily,

I find your situation just as sucky, sometimes I find dry heaving is worth because there is no end, at least if I’m bringing something up there is an end in sight.

Unfortunately and fortunately I’m not American, we don’t really have anything like the Mayo clinic, but at least my doctors and specialist appointments have all been less than $500 out of pocket every time.

DillyDaily,

Yup, 100% with the sign. Last I checked, it’s not like in order to be Jewish you have to kill children, in fact I’m pretty sure the religious texts promote love and compassion. Therefore saying “I fucking hate child killers” is not synonymous with “I don’t like Jewish people” because that venn diagram is not a circle, and child killers and sponsors of genocide are not a religious group.

I’m on the opposite side of the world to the conflict, a large number of synagogues and Jewish groups in my country are flooding to social media to condemn the needless deaths, and speak out against the actions of both Israel and Hamas on how they have both decimated innocent lives. So I’m in agreement with my local Jewish community and support what they are doing, and I don’t see how that could be antisemitic.

DillyDaily,

That feels like a large payout for that type of injury, but that’s not my business.

Everytime I hear news like this, or stories of people who “receive support for xyz injury, but can still do abc activity so must be cheating the system” I can’t help but think how brightly it highlights that the author has never had to experience chronic pain and dynamic disability.

Anyone who has ever injured anything knows, some days it just randomly hurts more than others, and you have very little control over predicting or changing that randomness other than through avoiding certain activities when you can to preserve your health and energy for days and times when you don’t have a choice and have to perform that action.

It’s also about balance.

Because of my wrists I can’t do the dishes and do latch hooking on the same day. I have to do the dishes, I can’t just live in squalor. But some days I also “need” to take some time for latch hooking because it’s a mindful hobby I find enjoyable and it’s so good for my mental health.

Now is it wrong of me to tell my OT that my wrists mean I struggle to do the dishes and latch key, so I’d like support with the dishes - maybe I get a dishwasher, or a helper twice a week to come in and do the heavy dishes for me.

If I’m sat on the couch doing my latch hooking putting pressure on my wrists “just for a hobby” while the dishwasher runs in the background - was I lying about my injury? Was I being a cheat? Do I no longer deserve the dishwasher because I’m “abusing it just so I can run off and have fun latch hooking”

She tossed one Christmas tree at a one off event.

How does that change the pain it is causes to play with her kids or carry groceries every single day that she wants and needs to do those tasks?

What games do you recommend for my girlfriend?

My girlfriend has never really gamed. But she’s now forced to move less than she would like to (health problem) and she’s getting bored. I was thinking of introducing her to a game or two that we could play together. She’s not the real action game type, and seeing as she has no experience with controller/mouse and keyboard...

DillyDaily,

If she loves organisation, “A Little to the Left” and “Unpacking” are cute.

Stardew Valley is being mentioned a lot and with good reason, there are a lot of elements to that game and you can choose which activities you like most - farming, mining, fighting monsters, foraging, interacting with villagers.

From there you can get a really good idea of what other games could be even better. For example if she loves the social side of Stardew Valley a Japanese Social Sim game might be fun too.

DillyDaily,

Technically they took Aotearoa in the name of Zeeland.

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