My life would be a-lot better if I could get addicted to drugs. Sadly my brain puts a hard stop to that and I just stop doing them mainly due to severe depression. I even used to smoke for like a month of nicotine vapes only to just quit outright.
Oh yeah due to lack of chemicals in my brain that lets me get addicted to things alongside having broken dopamine pathways. I can’t remember jack shit and the only thing I do remember are the things that my autism hyper focuses on or certain types of delusions or fantasies I have going on in my head including dreams. Sadly I also broke the more creative side of my brain after tripping too hard and now not even LSD can make me hallucinate as I can choose not to. It’s probably for the best that I’m grounded so far into reality that my delusions and fantasies are just intrusive thoughts now more than anything else.