rule
ChaoticNeutralCzech, 2 inches of what? If it’s hair, I’m disappointed but still amused at this way to advertise a regular hairdresser service
SingularEye, average day in LA
BodilessGaze, Too bad Nikolai Gogol isn’t around to see this
Skullgrid, 
neat, douglas hofstader is in town
Num10ck, incredible book.
nifty, 
Losing 2in is 30mins is basically water weight. Lose an extra .5in by pooing
/jk bc it doesn’t exactly work like that
ChaoticNeutralCzech, I know that you cannot rely on peeing/pooping harder for weight loss but how is “in” a unit of weight?
nifty, I meant inches around your torso
ChaoticNeutralCzech, That’s a really weird way to measure one’s fitness. Still, exhaling takes less than 3 seconds! /s
nifty, A better way to measure your fitness is to drink copiously and see how long it takes you to recover
/s
Neato, 
Hmm. How much? I’ve got a few extra lying around.
uriel238, 
My problem is while I am pretty sure I’m soulless, I also refuse to cheat someone by selling them something that doesn’t exist.
NegativeLookBehind, 
What if I want to gain two inches?
NickwithaC, 
🍪🍪🍪🍪
NegativeLookBehind, How do the cookies help me with my Phallic Expansion Endeavors (PEE)?
FQQD, 
Your endeavours are stored in the balls.
Bonsoir, What if I don’t have to inches?
YarHarSuperstar, 
You have to inches or no one will ever be able to inches ever again.
Skullgrid, just have one funnel cake… eating contest.
Senseless, Then you can call me. I’ll give you two inches.
AngryishHumanoid, If you want a couple extra inches in you I believe I can be of service.
ThisIsAManWhoKnowsHowToGling, 
That sounds like you need to go visit Procrustes and his wonderful bed that fits everyone — eventually.
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