Sterile_Technique

Sterile_Technique, 4 months ago

Well it’s like they say: can’t make an omelet without murdering a few babies!

Sterile_Technique, 4 months ago

…I mean, we have !twosentencehorror here on lemmy. Don’t crosspost from Reddit and redirect traffic back to that shit hole; just steal the content and post it here fresh.

Sterile_Technique, 4 months ago

Fair enough. Though I think those types of subs never intended to take themselves seriously, including the one here, so parody-post away.

Sterile_Technique, 4 months ago

If we, as a species decided to end homelessness (and I’m sorry this needs to be stated, but with homes, not mass murder)

looks at my own government teetering on fascism

Um… yea it needs to be stated.

Sterile_Technique, 4 months ago

But instead of hours of football, a break for music and commercials, then more hours of football, it should be hours of Weird Al concert, a break to let some jocks throw a ball around for a few mins while he takes a break to grab a drink, pee, etc, and then return for a couple more hours of Weird Al concert.

Sterile_Technique, 4 months ago

Reminds me of one of the ‘warnings’ they gave us in basic training - tldr is that the folks in finance are just as dumb as the rest of us, and invariably there are a couple recruits in every batch that have their first paycheck MAJORLY fucked up.

Like, instead of the $400 we’re supposed to get, we’d get like $40,000 cuz of some fat-finger fuckup in Excel.

The warning was “DO NOT TOUCH a single cent of money you’re not supposed to have, cuz they WILL notice and you WILL have to pay it back!”

…which in my mind translated to: “If you win the finance fuckery lottery, all your loans just became 0% interest!!”

I was not one of the lucky ones. Q_Q

Sterile_Technique, 4 months ago

dumbly censored

Reminds me of the time Paul Manafort’s lawers tried to redact text in a PDF by putting black highlights over it, but left the actual text so it could be copied, pasted into a word doc, and read in full, rofl.

Sterile_Technique, 5 months ago

Hmmm, send it back to R&D. The expelled gasses going directly into the horn would only produce a single-toned “HONK”. Instead, those gasses could be used to inflate a cuff that’s wrapped around a more traditional style clown horn bulb, squeezing the bulb and producing that same noise; but as the cuff loses pressure and bulb reinflates, the air it draws back will produce second tone, providing the clown horn’s signature “HEE-HAW” that our prospective murder victims expect and deserve.

Sterile_Technique, 6 months ago

Grounded is the game I wish I had when I was 10. Basically “Honey I shrunk the kids” as a multiplayer survival-builder.

Sterile_Technique, 6 months ago

The story and atmosphere are what set Witcher apart from other games. Gameplay is great, but it hasn’t been the driving force of any Witcher game.

Sterile_Technique, 7 months ago

We’ve been hooking kids on gambling since (at least) baseball cards, which -surprise!- were heavily lobbied to convince law makers to let it fly.

Consumers were doomed the instant we failed to torch and pitchfork that shit.

Sterile_Technique, 7 months ago

One that never really took off for the N64 almost surely because the controls were so fucked - Jetforce Gemini.

Those who took the time to tolerate and master the janky controls were rewarded with a shooter that was otherwise second to none. AND YES THAT INCLUDES 007!

Hearing the music cranks the nostalgia up to 10 immediately.

Sterile_Technique, 7 months ago

N64 and earlier consoles emulate really well on smartphones. In terms of storage, those games are tiny, so you could probably fit Nintendo’s entire library from the first Gameboy through the N64 on your phone if you wanted to.

Way higher quality than pretty much every mobile game, free, no micro transactions, no ads (assuming your emulator isn’t shit).

If you want to game on your phone, this is the way.

Sterile_Technique, 7 months ago

They absolutely play better with a controller, but you’d be surprised how not-terrible the touch screen interface is after just a bit of getting used to it.

I break out Mario 64 or the two Zelda 64’s occasionally and outside of just a few wonky parts (aiming the bow… ugh…) the play quality is alright on touch screen alone (+ binding one of the volume keys to Z).

Sterile_Technique, 7 months ago

Couldn’t tell you which verse/s they’re in off the top of my head, but there’s a group mentioned in the Bible called the “Pharisees” who, despite being outwardly super pious, were at odds with Jesus because of their hyper-focus with man-made rules and their obsession with showy shit that broadcasted their religious status to everyone around them, but failed to help anyone who wasn’t one of their own.

It’s my favorite because it sets a biblical basis for why Jesus would fucking hate modern Christianity. The hordes of people who go to church every week, wear their cross necklaces, slap the fish logo on the back of their truck… and then vote to make “thy neighbor’s” life a living hell if that neighbor happens to be something other than a straight white male christian… those are the modern day Pharisees. And the venn diagram of today’s Christians and modern Pharisees is just a single, crisp circle.

Sterile_Technique, 7 months ago

You’ve got The Secret World on there already, but worth mentioning they did a remake: Secret World Legends. Whole ton of QoL changes, combat was revamped, but otherwise the same game.

Suuuuuper niche game, but if it happens to be your niche it’ll become one of your all time favorites.

Sterile_Technique, 7 months ago

Skyrim-like

Enderal.

Official page here: sureai.net/games/enderal/

Original Skyrim version: …steampowered.com/…/Enderal_Forgotten_Stories/

2016 Skyrim re-release “special edition” version: …steampowered.com/…/Enderal_Forgotten_Stories_Spe…

You’ll need whichever version corresponds with the version of skyrim you own. If you own both, I’d recommend choosing the version of enderal that goes with the version of skyrim that you play the least - because it uses skyrim’s assets, switching back and forth has been known to corrupt saves, so back up any skyrim saves you care about.

Anywho, Enderal is set in its own universe - it looks and kind of feels like skyrim because it’s built from the same blocks, but has nothing to do with the Elder Scrolls, or Tamriel, etc (barring a few easter eggs). New lore, new characters, new terrain, new music, new voice acting.

The company that made it is “SureAI” - indie dev crew that has nothing to do with AI. /shrug. It’s a predominately German studio, and while Enderal is available in English, iirc the English version is voice acted mostly by German native speakers who happen to know English as a second language. Reason for mentioning that is: be gentle in your judgement of the voice acting, lol. Along the main quest line, it’s pretty much all rock solid; some of the side quests and random NPCs… not so much. And the children NPC voice acting is fucking awful. The console command “TAI” (after targeting an entity) can be used to shut up an annoying NPC without breaking it - just TAI it again if you happen to need to interact with it for a quest or something later.

Speaking of the command console - don’t be afraid to use the command console!! Again, this game is built on Skyrim’s engine/assets, so it comes with all of skyrim’s problems - e.g., step on a basket full of cabbage; get launched into low orbit. Things like quest items falling through the floor n’ shit can happen, so you may need to use the console to force a quest to progress or some shit - also save frequently, same reason. And from a technical standpoint, some of the shit they do with Skyrim’s engine is mindblowing.

Not much of a sales pitch so far lol. The good stuff though: Enderal’s story is pretty wild. There isn’t really a traditional antagonist - instead it tackles concepts ranging from philosophical to religious to emotions / repressed emotions… this game WILL get under your skin, but in a really artistic kind of way. Very much a passion project by the devs.

Combat and skills are completely redone. It’s not like Skyrim where you can just shoot icicles up a mudcrab’s ass until your destruction level is 100. It plays kinda like an oldschool RPG where killing shit gives you overall-level xp, but raising skills requires skillbooks that you’ll need to find or buy. Also the things that were OP in skyrim are no longer so - try the sneaky archer build in Enderal and you’ll get your ass handed to you in pretty much every encounter. I recall having a lot of fun with the 2H sword path; and the magic ‘schools’ are mostly redone (like iirc there’s a school of ‘Entropy’ that an entire talent tree dedicated to dark lifesteal type spells, and stronger attacks that use HP instead of mana) so read through the options, cuz a lot of them will be totally new.

Even with all the combat tweaks though, it plays pretty familiar to Skyrim, just don’t lean too heavily into Skyrim’s tricks.

The story though, and the way they tell it… holy shit. If you’re a bookworm, you know when you finish the last page of a REALLY good book, and then get hit by that kind of empty feeling as it sinks in that the ride is over, and you want more but know there’s nothing left? I’ve played a fuckton of videogames, and only ONE has ever hit me with that at its conclusion: and yup, it’s Enderal.

It’s a slow start, and there’s some jankiness in general like the occasional shit voice acting and technical instability, but if you can look passed that shit (and I mean, keep in the back of your mind that it’s a FREE passion project from an indie dev crew with no real budget), then this game will go down as one of your all time favorites.

Sterile_Technique, 7 months ago

How was the book?

Sterile_Technique, 8 months ago

Elder millennial, here. One of the weird things about the 90s was cereal boxes marketed to little bastards like me at the time would often have some kind of toy included in it.

PC gaming was kind of in its infancy and growing rapidly in popularity, so eventually the inevitable happed: a cereal company promoted their cereal by shoving a fucking CD into it, that little bastards like me lost their shit over, installed, and played the snot out of.

Chex Quest.

It was literally just Doom, except reskinned so the demons were boogers, and everything else was a fucking Chex cereal advertisement.

AND IT WAS AMAZING! lol

Best box of cereal my parents ever bought. Not a bargain bin, but I feel like “in a box of cereal” fits the spirit of the question.

Sterile_Technique, 8 months ago

In the current state of the internet, they probably started getting death threats shortly after the project was announced cuz the kerning on an in-game billboard was a little off.

Doesn’t take much now-a-days.

Sterile_Technique, 8 months ago

Can we just give the franchise back to Bungie and let them pick up where they left off, and pretend the 343 shit never happened?

Sterile_Technique, 8 months ago

sunglasses We’re gettin’ the band back togetha.

Sterile_Technique, 8 months ago

Here’s hoping the project isn’t scrapped, but I’m not convinced they’d scrub all mention of it over a music license.

Sterile_Technique, 8 months ago

Fuck, I was excited for this one.