pigup,
blanketswithsmallpox,

Now do it on command!

CptEnder,

Damn sounded like a Motocross race starting line

JohnDClay,
CptEnder,

He’s used to drink like a 24 pack a beer at a time too lmao the man really was just living life with +130% settings.

buttfarts,

That’s my jam

Iheartcheese,
@Iheartcheese@lemmy.world avatar

One time I farted and it smelled so bad I honestly wondered if I needed a doctor.

Rayspekt,

When, in fact, you needed real estate.

rmuk,

Roland the Farter: [Does a jump]

Roland the Farter: [Whistles once]

Roland the Farter: [Farts]

King Henry II: [ Beckons to the camera]

King Henry II: It’s free real estate.

TseseJuer,

how many farts?

FozzyOsbourne,

I did one so bad once that they had to call a priest

Rayspekt,

I like that the also gave him the occupation of “flatulist” as he must have been a professional.

RecluseRamble,

Not only that but as the screenshot indicates, “flatulist” even has its own Wikipedia page. It indeed was (is?) an occupation.

pyre,

his legacy lives on with Donald the Farter

juice702,

How do I become a flatulist?

don,

You’re gonna need beans. Lots of beans.

Thteven,
@Thteven@lemmy.world avatar

They’re in the right place https://i.imgur.com/xJTN3Wj.jpeg

iamtrashman1312,

Tom Beanbadil

pyre,

Tom Bumbulum

kemsat,

Learn to play the flute?

postmateDumbass,

But how?

kemsat,

Iono

madmaurice,
@madmaurice@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

“Back then we really had to work”

Kolanaki,
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

“One Jump, One Whistle, and One Fart” sounds like it could be a parody of “One Bourbon, One Scotch, and One Beer.”

PhoreTwunny, (edited )

Well I ain’t seen my baby, don’t know where she’s been / I’ve been eating broccoli, cabbage, rice and beans / Gonna smell foul man, when I let loose / Give you a triple-shot of my toots / But that’s not all there is, yeah that’s only one part / When I do one whistle, one jump, and one fart / One whistle / One jump / And one fart

thefrankring,
@thefrankring@lemmy.world avatar

Next time I see my boss, I know what to do

Stalinwolf,
@Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca avatar

I could bag that house myself with a steady supply of cauliflower and Beyond Meat burgers. Shit, I probably have Roland beat already.

brosaph,

“Bumbulum”

GroundedGator,

I will now learn to speak this word fluently and use it often to announce my farts.

Excuse me, I must retire to the veranda to tune my bumbulum.

empireOfLove2,
@empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

and people complain about “bullshit jobs” these days

Xeroxchasechase,

Dear colleagues,

I hope this email finds you well. As per my last email I’m delighted to inform you that last year’s farter, who had proven himself of a great value and an asset, will be joining our team.

I expect nothing but the highest standards for the king’s farting festival. He was most generous for giving us the opportunity to travel his land, we are grateful for his generousity and thus don’t want to fuck it up.

Best regards, Xero

Rustmilian,
@Rustmilian@lemmy.world avatar

Legends say he started the first gas company.

folekaule,

He was a “flautist” alright.

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