Sam_Bass,

Yeah my mom was my dad for all but the first 3 years. My dad decided early he wanted another setup, so took off and got one. So somewhere out there i have a half brother and sister and all their resultant kin. We dont communicate

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

Thought you were saying your mom was trans at first.

ParabolicMotion,

It’s a real joke of a card when you’re forced to hand it off to the man you’ve been told to call “dad” throughout life, knowing good and well he did NOT make any part of you.

emptiestplace,

Why did you write this here?

ParabolicMotion,

Why did you bother reading it here?

emptiestplace,

It was no trouble.

Lifebandit666,

Oh I feel this comment, after watching my Wife’s mother do the same thing to her all her life.

“Say hi to your new Dad!”

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

Your dad doesn’t have to be biologically related to you to be your dad. Hell, plenty of ones that are aren’t dads in any other sense. What matters if he was a good or shitty dad, not biology.

ParabolicMotion,

The card is about BIOLOGICAL fathers. If your dad’s gametes didn’t make you, then you might want to choose a different card.

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

Yeah, that too.

asteriskeverything,

Read this a fascist swimmer and imo that is a much funnier card I’d wanna buy.

MindTraveller,

Actually, the fastest swimmer bangs his head on the egg’s shell and gets none.

Meron35,

Second sperm gets the yolk

Coasting0942,

Not an expert but I don’t think it’s as simple as “fastest swimmer”.

variants,

The one that happened to show up when the mob made an opening*

driving_crooner,
@driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br avatar

Thr ovulo selects the sperm and open the door for it.

aeki,

And people forget that we’re also the egg.

RecluseRamble,

The egg is actually the major part of it (mitochondria?)

aeki,

Yes, the mitochondria and all the other organelles. We’re mostly egg.

far_university1990,

We support you until you ready to crack shell and come out

RIPandTERROR,
@RIPandTERROR@sh.itjust.works avatar

🏳️‍⚧️

Lifebandit666,

No no, people don’t forget the egg, it’s just that the egg is just a bloody smear without the magic serum.

uzay,

And the serum is just a stain in your sock without the magic egg.

Lifebandit666,

Exactly, it’s when the magic happens that it matters. Otherwise it’s smears all around

paddirn,

“You came for me, Dad.”

JoMiran,
@JoMiran@lemmy.ml avatar
blanketswithsmallpox,

FLazy: Father’s Day/Date Sun, Jun 16, 2024 for the USA.

You’ve still got like 2 weeks for the people who care.

balderdash9,

Seriously, why did OP post this two weeks ahead of time

brbposting,

Poster-sized prints take a while.

Just kidding, the idea of sending this to one’s own father is rather repulsive. Guess some of y’all are weirdos though and that’s cool :)

nilloc,

These are the kinds of cards my wife might have given me before my son was old enough to pick one out for me.

balderdash9,

Yeah, my dad would disown me again if I sent him this

robotica,

Because outside of the US, Father’s day is in 4 days :)

RecluseRamble,

In Germany father’s day was 3 weeks ago. But it’s actually a Christian holiday and people came to call it father’s day because we don’t have an official one and wanted a day for drinking.

All people drink on father’s day though and we also drink on other days but that’s what we have now.

FancyPantsFIRE,

Jokes on them, we used IVF, they got picked for who knows what reason under a microscope.

From your most photogenic swimmer.

Paradachshund,

“Damn, look at the tail on that one!”

DragonTypeWyvern,

Just saying, approximately 10% of IVF babies don’t have the genetics they think they do…

jol,

Even in the old school way, this postcard is incorrect. The winner is rarely the fastest swimmer, as several sperm arrive at the egg before a single one is allowed inside.

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

Yeah, the egg decides who gets let in. “Happy Father’s Day from your most attractive (to Mom’s egg) swimmer”

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