TetraVega,

The only 2 Jenkinses I know are Leeroy Jenkins, and Jenkins from How I Met Your Mother.

FlyingSquid,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar
UnderpantsWeevil,
@UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world avatar
TheLowestStone,
@TheLowestStone@lemmy.world avatar

How would murdering a modern Scottish rock band stop the world wars?

normalexit,

They asked to be taken out, what more do you need to go on?

JackbyDev,

I recently heard the song is about two snipers trying to shoot each other. (No idea of it is true.)

umbraroze,

I prefer this version: Wikihistory

jaybone,

I wished I could go back in time and kill DevOps, before it became a thing.

JackbyDev,

Now you have DevOps but everyone just calls it Ops.

Stalinwolf,
@Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca avatar

JENKINS WAS MY PA!!!

TokenBoomer,
RagingRobot,

I thought this was going to be a dev ops joke at first then it never came

lugal,

Isn’t Jenkins the robot servant in the masterpiece City by Simak? Great book!

lugal,
samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

Well, was Jenkins worse than Hitler?

Semi_Hemi_Demigod,
@Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world avatar

My inclination is that Hitler was the least bad way out of that situation. Give Germany another decade and some other nationalist party would come to power, only this time they’ve got a decade of research behind them and maybe they get the bomb first. Or maybe the leader isn’t a drug-addled former artist who gets his entire staff hooked on uppers and they’re actually effective at defeating their enemies.

So the reason we always seem to have Hitler is because the time cops keep people from killing him because the other timelines are even worse.

SpaceCadet,
@SpaceCadet@feddit.nl avatar

only this time they’ve got a decade of research behind them and maybe they get the bomb first

Maybe that’s why we’re living in the universe where this didn’t happen, because in the universe where it did, we wouldn’t exist (many worlds/anthropic principle interpretation)

jaybone,

Then what are the time cops doing about Trump?

TheLowestStone,
@TheLowestStone@lemmy.world avatar

Shit… is this evidence that he’s the lesser of two evils? I don’t know if I can handle that thought.

cammoblammo,

The best thing about his presidency was his total incompetence in getting what he wanted. Imagine what would happen if Steve Bannon or Steven Miller were more than just the puppetmasters…

JasonDJ,

Steven Miller

I’d call him “Maurice”.

IzzyJ,

Would explain the failed assassination attempts

KevonLooney,

There are no “time cops” because even existing in the past changes things. It’s impossible to change the past and return to “the present” that you know. It would be a completely different timeline even if you just observe.

Schadrach,

No, not at all. There is a single coherent timeline. The world as it exists now is the final total of all time travel that will ever be going to have occurred to points before now.

You could try to go back and kill Hitler, but we already know you failed.

JackbyDev,

They’re talking about a different set of time travel rules. Time travel is fictional so it doesn’t need to be logical.

JoShmoe,

First the tiktok witches erase one of our moons, now some asshole took away Jenkins before his prime. What’s next?

kameecoding,

This is a shittier version of this skit

youtu.be/2o7e1i7nJuQ?si=iCRex5rxPkP2pFFs

FIST_FILLET,

fuck that’s good. here’s a tangentially related one with surprisingly high production quality www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VQ2iVZMQ1U

IMongoose,

I’ve also come to share a tangentially related video:

youtu.be/9S75Rfva9O8?si=on2NdTUO3Fr1ErVw

FIST_FILLET,

brilliant!

MindTraveller,

I can’t verify that because that skit has a much larger file size and I ain’t streaming that. I have other things to download.

corus_kt,

The hardest choices require the strongest wills. They do not remember you, nor what you’ve sacrificed… but I will honor you, slayer of Jenkins, hero to humanity o7

Nicoleism101, (edited )

If we killed hitler we would have more competent nazi and possibly still third reich over here but no Poland and I am selfish I wanna exist ya know

Best person would be trump as it is recent enough to not suddenly cease to exist due to various butterfly effects, still pretty risky though. All of people that died by accidents between trump election and today would be from different, new set. You can calculate probability even based on average yearly accidents.

God I shudder to think what if u killed Julius Caesar. We would be like unrecognisable due to all branching out possibilities over the years. Real quantum parallel worlds shit

ynthrepic,
@ynthrepic@lemmy.world avatar

The good news is that if someone went back and changed the past, then events would transpire such that they never had to go back in time for that reason, and so they wouldn’t., i.e. nothing would change. Not unless the whole exercise spins only the time traveler off into their own new universe in which they’re the only one with a memory of this alternative timeline from which they came.

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

what if u killed Julius Caesar

Wonder what the month of July would be called?

Shardikprime,

Myly

practisevoodoo,

September

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

Then what would September be?

practisevoodoo,

November

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

Let’s make it easier, what are all the months in the new timeline where Julius Caesar was killed before becoming famous called?

practisevoodoo,

Well now we’re getting really speculative. But probably what we have now but with something like undember or under and duoly or duoer in the 11 and 12 month positions.

letsgo,

Well if Brutus took over, Brutey?

drunkpostdisaster,

All months will be named after Pompey.

jubilationtcornpone,

And August.

AngryCommieKender,

Might be able to avoid The Nazis and The Bolsheviks gaining power altogether by going to 1970, buying a year’s worth of McDonald’s food, and delivering it to Taft in 1911. He’s so damn fat he got stuck in the tub in The White House. He’ll happily eat that shit and hopefully die before the 1912 election, allowing Teddy to have his third and fourth term. In a head to head race between Roosevelt and Wilson, Wilson doesn’t have a prayer of winning.

youtu.be/hLiI6kXZkZI?si=6xtXMaIJ_PQSf186

drunkpostdisaster,

That and Trump might not even make to the election anyway.

JackbyDev,

what if u killed Julius Caesar

Then the NCR would take over. Can’t you see that they’re just as bad?? Nevermind the slaves.

the_artic_one, (edited )

We rolled back your change to fix Jenkins, please remember to run preflight checks before submitting.

JackbyDev,

The build passed on my machine. … Oh wait, my COVID bug fix didn’t make it into main. Uh oh.

Zehzin,
@Zehzin@lemmy.world avatar

Kids these days aren’t even extratemporal enough to remember Jenkins smh

DarkCloud,

Wait, I think I’m experiencing the Mandello effect…

theangryseal,

It’s called the Mandeller effect. You’re trying to stir shit up, aren’t you?

rimmedalpha,

Please, everyone knows it is the Momoa effect.

lesnout27,

*Don Melon effect.

variants,

That was before, now it’s post melon

SeekPie,

God I love lemmy

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

It’s the Mengele Effect.

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