@Assman@sh.itjust.works
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Assman

@Assman@sh.itjust.works

Asses to asses, butts to butts

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Assman,
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Behold, a dog

Assman, (edited )
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You talking Russian citizens in Ukraine, or ethnically Russian Ukrainian citizens?

🤡👇

Assman,
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Hey I’m just curious. Wasn’t sure if “has a passport” was the same thing as being a citizen, which I assume would make you eligible for the draft.

Assman,
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Why are you trying to take the job of food eater away from a dog?

Assman,
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fastest cars

You can buy a mid level sedan with a turbo today that will blow the doors off of most cars from that era. I mean we have cars today with 1500+ horsepower with zero modifications.

Assman,
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…wikipedia.org/…/List_of_production_cars_by_power…

Assman,
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I think a more effective comparison to get your point across is the fact that a base level Civic is making more power than a '67 Nova SS.

You’re literally just rewording the first sentence of my original comment dawg.

Assman,
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Then why say any of this at all lol you’re suggesting I make an analogy I already made

Assman,
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Yeah but I didn’t feel like working today, so

Assman,
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it is obvious that Ukraine can not stand on its own feet

  • head of NATO and EU member state
Assman,
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Did you just call anthem a “massively popular title”

Assman,
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You’re thinking of boxbeaters

Assman,
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Real men die in a boiler explosion

Assman,
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I get the last one. Hunched over a warm thing. Spraying liquid. That’s basically what sex is.

Assman,
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Long overdue. This MFer has a hundred moons. How many does America have? That’s right, one. We’re doing something WRONG.

Assman,
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I’ll bring the warheads to give peasants a mental breakdown, and the laser pointer to fuck with medieval cats.

Assman,
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They made the civic too fucking big. I could stick my old 87 hatchback in my front pocket.

Assman,
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Is this moss?

Assman,
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You leave a bit of yourself in the world, the world leaves a bit of carcinogens in you ❤️

Assman,
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If I ever get executed that way I hope mine is a rocking electric chair.

Assman, (edited )
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Idk about y’all but I’ll eat raw flour when I’m high. Any non poisonous calories are fair game to stoner me.

Edit: I need to teach y’all the art of hyperbole

Assman,
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Brother, you are third person to say that exact same thing when I was clearly just fucking around in the first place

Assman,
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This is why Jesus don’t come back

Assman,
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Leader of millennias old pedophile ring says people changing their birth-assigned gender is dangerous

Assman,
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Why are they unbuttoned? Why?

Assman,
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Meme is fleeting

Assman,
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Can you believe the jeans on this guy!?

Assman,
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I jant junderstand your jaccent

Assman,
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I’ll distract the raiders with my amusing vanity plate.

Assman,
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As a hoosier I also support this message

Assman,
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In the sequel she bangs a moose

Assman,
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What’s this jaundice erasure

Assman,
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Ah, sorry man you got scammed. You actually have to send it by mail. I’ll dm you the address.

Assman,
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They used to have a mute button on the self checkout but they took it off. Bastards

Assman,
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Fair, but they also could just make it re-enable the sound when a new checkout starts.

Assman,
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I like my pizza crunchy

Assman, (edited )
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Here’s a crazy idea, but hear me out: what if the government produced the cocaine and taxed it, taking billions of dollars away from criminals and creating millions in new tax revenue. People are gonna do coke no matter who makes it.

Exclusive: Chinese police work in Kiribati, Hawaii's Pacific neighbour (www.reuters.com)

SYDNEY, Feb 23 (Reuters) - Chinese police are working in the remote atoll nation of Kiribati, a Pacific Ocean neighbour of Hawaii, with uniformed officers involved in community policing and a crime database program, Kiribati officials told Reuters....

Assman,
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They’re neighbors in the sense that they’re both inside that ocean that covers half of the planet.

Assman,
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I’ve never met a Greg I didn’t like. I’ve also never met a Greg.

Assman,
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Lemon peel is highly flammable

Assman,
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What the fuck kinda denim is that? Why does it have a wood grain?

Assman,
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Yes but now it’s Istanbul, not Constantinople

Assman,
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Shithole country

Assman,
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Close, someone pooped in the hot tub

Assman,
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Do they still make that face wash with the plastic balls in it

Assman,
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I mean they have like three allies at this point, and two of them can’t even keep the electric on for 24 hours

Assman,
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I drink the sink water

Assman,
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They have 20k employees

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