pinkdrunkenelephants,

Then watch her learn how to echolocate and then blind him permanently 🤦

Jesus Christ. Kids do stupid shit like that. They don’t even say how old the kid is. You literally could just bitch at them and make them stop if they were old enough. Or put something harmless but bad tasting on a wig or something and have the kid chew on that, breaking the cycle.

Why do people have to be like this?

Cornucopiaofplenty,

I can’t tell if this comment is bait

EmergMemeHologram,

I think 1 day blinding stew would work as well as a bittering agent. You think she’s going to forget blinding stew?

pinkdrunkenelephants,

That’s exactly the sort of thing you don’t want your kid remembering. All it will do is foster in her a vengeance against you, and she would have a pretty legitimate grievance. Who blinds a child, no matter how temporary?

EmergMemeHologram,

Your parents didn’t give you blinding stew?

It’s not that bad. It doesn’t hurt, it’s scary at first but you adapt. It never made me want to get revenge on my parents, and I haven’t jaywalked since. I actually got it twice when I got suspended from school but the second time was baloney.

pinkdrunkenelephants, (edited )

Blinding stew isn’t actually real. It’s the fact that people apparently would use it wholeheartedly, on children, that’s horrific.

webadict,

Lmao, this guy never got the blinding stew. My first time was when my mom thought I stole a candy bar from the grocery store, but it turned out my sister did it and planted on me, so she got double dosed, it was pretty funny.

pinkdrunkenelephants,

Either you’re doing a good job of playing along or I am actually hearing about something legitimately worse than the abuse I suffered as a child. I don’t know whether to give you kudos or sympathy.

Kolanaki,
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

I had stew that blinds me as a kid and I turned out fine.

Daxtron2,

I love that Alan Wagner’s IRL shitposts are becoming so popular the past week lol

Chocrates,

This is the “I eat dirt” guy right? 🤣

Shameless,

deleted_by_author

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  • FeatherConstrictor,

    I can’t decide whether or not this is a genuine comment and it’s fucking hilarious

    Schmuppes,

    I’m confused as well. I assume that the suggestion is not to poison the child, but what is it?

    trashgirlfriend,

    one day blinding stew

    __Lost__,

    It’s a joke. This is the advice that a witch would give in a fairy tale.

    xx3rawr,

    Or from a Minecraft player

    Jorgelino,

    Sounds like someone needs a bowl of blinding stew.

    SpiceyDejarik,

    Less of an American thing, and more of a Shitpost thing.

    knowyourmeme.com/…/what-in-the-world-is-perpetual…

    Patches,

    Shit posting from the Darkages

    rickyrigatoni,

    Europeans fear the blind stew.

    Sorgan71,

    Epic child blindness moment

    taanegl,

    Just being you is enough, I guess.

    Toes,

    The only soup I can imagine capable of that involves mushrooms from the fey wilds.

    AngryCommieKender,

    Cylocybin won’t make you blind, but you may see faries

    XEAL,

    I’m making custom cards for Cards Against Humanity and this is gold

    don,

    Is a porridge out of the question? Are soups a no-go? How about a simple Broth of Blinding for One Day? Does it really have to be a stew?

    lugal,

    CMV: Porridge is a kind of soup (and so are cereals)

    LinkOpensChest_wav,
    @LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

    Shut up!

    lugal,

    They hated Jesus because he was telling the truth

    Mwallerby,

    I agree that porridge is a soup, since it’s cooked all together. A bowl of cereal’s constituent parts can also be eaten independently so I believe that makes it a salad.

    A7thStone,

    But what about hot cereals?

    bitwaba,

    Hot salad. Mmm

    AngryCommieKender,

    You don’t have to make most of them hot. Overnight oats, grits, and quinoa are things.

    A7thStone,

    Oatmeal needs to be hot, and quinoa is horrible.

    EmergMemeHologram,

    No porridge is not a soup.

    You cook porridge by boiling off water until you hit the right amount of water absorbed into the cereal, and it not being soup or gruel like. The starchiness also plays a role in consistency.

    Porridge does not use or create a broth, soup does.

    Porridge is always cooked until there is no or little liquid left, you can’t have soup without liquid.

    I am willing to entertain whether nothing that porridge can be a stew, but it is not a soup.

    lugal,

    But cereals are soup and porridge is a stew?

    EmergMemeHologram,

    Cereal grains, like oats, prepared as a porridge are a stew. Cereal and milk is soup.

    DaCookeyMonsta,

    Of course it has to be a stew, what are you some kind of sociopath who gives blinding soup to kids?

    ShaggySnacks,

    what are you some kind of sociopath who gives blinding soup to kids?

    raises hand I’m that kind of sociopath.

    Mamertine,

    Broth is to weak.

    I guess a soup might do.

    Personally, I’d go with the blinding burrito.

    HikingVet,

    It takes a pillage to raze a child.

    tygerprints,

    Feed her a stew that makes her go blind for a day. Well since we're at it, you can also pull all her teeth out with pliers and cut her thumbs off so she can't grab anything. Certainly blinding a child for being a child isn't any kind of sick child abuse (: 0

    key,

    That’s absurd. How are you supposed to reattach the thumbs after a day? And have you tried pulling teeth from a child? It’s like… well… pulling teeth.

    The blinding stew meanwhile is a time tested parenting technique.

    tygerprints,

    You don't reattach the thumbs, you add them to the stew with some nice lentils and carrots. Why waste good meat.

    EmergMemeHologram,

    The teeth do grow back, but if you pull them before their natural schedule it takes a long time and can necessitate needing braces later.

    Pyroglyph,
    @Pyroglyph@lemmy.world avatar

    Ah yes, because permanent physical mutilation is exactly the same as 24-hour inconvenience.

    What the fuck is wrong with you?

    bort,

    just reapply the thumbs when she starts to behave. Nobody said anything about making it permanenty. smh…

    Tangent5280,

    My pardnts resrtached mj tgunbs sll tge tjme. I tjdned okt jkst fime.

    tygerprints,

    Sure, you tjdned okt jkst fime, but whtdboot awlw de otters.

    tygerprints,

    24 hours of imposed blindness would be one HUGE hell of a lot more than a mere inconvenience. That's my whole point, maybe you should try it. Soon you are going to find out exactly what it's like.

    Meowoem,

    I’m sure most of us here had 1 day blinding stew as kids when we were naughty and it never did us any harm.

    tygerprints,

    So is this 1 day blinding stew an actual thing or is it from some book or movie of some kind? I mean in my family pantheon of books there are some ancient recipes for a blinding cast but nothing that is for kids or lasts for 1 day - the cost of blinding a kid would come with too hefty a price, as most real magic takes a toll on the caster.

    Meowoem,

    No it’s not an actual thing lol, it’s funny because it’s absurd

    tygerprints,

    I just wonder because everyone's referencing it now. It's absurd all right.

    Sidhean,

    1 Day Blinding Stew

    Imgonnatrythis,

    The other side of the poll has a questionnaire about how to prepare a 1day blinding stew.

    CommunicationOk3492,

    Where could someone obtain this mysterious knowledge?

    kautau,

    deleted_by_author

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  • tomcatt360,
    @tomcatt360@lemmy.world avatar

    The non-Fandom wiki is better.

    minecraft.wiki/w/Suspicious_Stew

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