I’m conflicted. I have a parent who’s dying. I feel the void of the parenting I was supposed to receive. They never fulfilled any of the obligations I consider appropriate. I’m a parent, now. They did none of the things I’m doing for my kids....
We're all different, so you do you, but I was in what sounds like a similar situation not long ago so I'll share my experience - my estranged parent was hospitalised in critical condition and expected to die, and I suddenly got bombarded with guilt trips by relatives who I'd also not heard from in years and years and who I'm certain don't know how badly I was treated, who insisted I should get in touch before the end.
I didn't.
My parent recovered and as far as I know is basically fine again, and I have zero regret, or intention to get in touch.
I won't lie and say it was easy, or that I didn't go through emotional hell those few weeks (E: because the twinge of doubt/guilt/hope that they will change never really fully goes away), but I've learned to trust my gut, and to never stop reminding myself that they never have, and never will, own up to how they treated me, let alone apologise - they've had plenty of opportunity to do both, and haven't, so why the fuck do I, the child in the relationship, have to be the bigger person? They never were to me..
Whatever you do, it'll be shit, because it's a shit situation, so the best you can do to make a decision is prioritise your own well being and do your best to ignore the external judgment (that we often also internalise and need to then recognise as an external voice even though it's in our own mind) of those who don't know the relationship like you do. Trust yourself.
And either way - I'm sorry you're having to go through this, it sucks.
But most people don't directly benefit from, and are directly involved in, the systems that encourage such behaviour, like the ones at the top are.
Most people are just grinding away selling their labour to survive while convinced by the wealthy-owned media and trillion dollar marketing industrial complex that they're just temporarily embarrassed millionaires who just need to consume more to make their lives better. Insert "we are not the same" meme here
The point is that the "desire" is entirely artificial and enforced on us as society by those who profit from doing so (and their trillion dollar industries dedicated to this task), not that some people are struggling, because all of us but a tiny miniscule percent of humanity, are struggling (including the non-existent "middle class", another lie there to maintain division in the working class, and the illusion of "aspiration"), we're just made to believe it's normal and part of human nature, when it is anything but.
Whatever "truth" Buddhism has is honestly irrelevant, especially because it predates Adam Smith and the levels of unprecedented social engineering and indoctrination we're subjected to in the name of capitalism by so long, its idea of "desire" is completely detached from yours, but even if it wasn't, all that "truth" is is victim blaming, and shifting responsibility for systemic issues on to individuals, which is a classic tactic employed by those in charge (be it kings, feudal lords, "gods" prophets and whatever other religious figurehead, or capitalists) because it serves them and only them, for us to be pointing fingers at one another (while ignoring literally all of the environmental factors they impose on us) instead of at them.
I never said or even implied we have no agency, but I'm also not deluded enough to think we have free choice under capitalism. We are not only literally indoctrinated from birth and essentially brainwashed our entire lives from that point in to consumerism and "keeping up with the Joneses", but we are also entirely dependant on participation in the system for survival because it is designed that way. You wanting to think you're somehow above it (even if you have learned to identify some of the propaganda and try to avoid it, which is simply impossible to do), or wanting to blame those who aren't "above it" for the system instead of those actively implementing and profiting directly from it, doesn't change that.
Freedom, and specifically freedom of choice, is capitalism's biggest con.
Yes, and the lead being buried in OP being the headline (and most of the rest of the article around the paragraph you quoted):
Neuralink’s first implant partly detached from patient’s brain
Some of the threads connecting the chip to the brain began to retract. The Elon Musk-owned company did not explain why
The patient, Noland Arbaugh, underwent surgery in February to attach a Neuralink chip to his brain, but the device’s functionality began to decrease within the month after his implant.
I never consent to give my data away or being tracked, but how do you deal with so called legitimate interest? I tried several times to untick them but it is a long list (in fact at the bottom there is a “vendors” link with even longer, much longer list. It took me 10 minutes to get to the bottom of it once)....
If it won't let me untick all but the essential cookies easily - close tab, move on.
Recently I realised that some "reject all" options still don't reject the "legitimate" bullshit, so I now avoid those sites too (and no, I don't trust that extensions that claim to reject all for me will actually reject all).
I've got better things to do with my time than scrutinise these cookie pop ups and/or go through lengthy lists individually unticking options. Fuck that noise - don't have minimal respect for users? Then I'm definitely not providing you any of my data (the sites that make it the hardest rarely hold information you can't easily find elsewhere)..
That would only work if the governments are independent of the capitalists, but that isn't the case, which is why waiting for either of those groups to act in favour of any interests that aren't their own and in favour of their bottom line, is an exercise in futility.
I recently got a Sony prs 600 e reader from 2009. The battery is at the end of its life (It lasts about 3 days with heavy reading, and a couple weeks without reading). No backlight, no Wi-Fi, just an SD card that I can load epub files and small PDFs. The screen is slow and the contrast isn’t the best. The “touch screen” is...
"Obscenely rich proud for poor people to celebrate him for doing less than the bare minimum"
Other obscenely rich people doing less, doesn't make this shit uplifting nor worth praise, it still is literally less than the bare minimum. Fuck this noise.
That's because you haven't extracted 95 times that first.
I guarantee you - even if you haven't paid a single penny in tax your entire life, by virtue of not being a billionaire, you have contributed significantly more to society than this leech ever has or will.
It's scary how good a job the billionaires have done in convincing you (and many many others) it's somehow the other way around.
Except as I said, this is less than bare minimum, it doesn't even come near "good" let alone "perfect", it's literally a PR stunt designed to make you think it's good, and all you're doing here is proving how well it works as the system keeps chugging along and this billionaire, like all the others, continues getting richer at our expense.
So to paraphrase - it's bootlicking that is the enemy of progress, and you're getting a nice mouthful there.
alt text: "stop normalising the grind and start normalising whatever this is" above a painting of a forest where two bear cubs are up on their hind legs dancing together and two other bears are chilling under a tree watching them
I love that song, it was on one of the children's songs compilation cassettes I used to listen to as a kid.. It did come to mind when I was writing the description!
Joewackle J Kusi was finishing his film Nyame Mma when an anti-LGBTQ+ bill was passed, bringing the threat of prosecution for those ‘promoting’ queer stories...
Bottom row for me, though the no need to sleep feels like a trick, but I'll risk it assuming it means I'm never tired (as opposed to being always tired, like I am now).
I wouldn't be so proudly proclaiming "I'm German" as if that gives you automatic and universal knowledge, or authority, if you'd like, on, well, anything, if I were you, instead I'd get out of the way, humble myself, and go study some history.
"Only one thing could have stopped our movement – if our adversaries had understood its principle and from the first day smashed with the utmost brutality the nucleus of our new movement." -Adolf Hitler
Providing transphobes with more fuel for their hate (the only "evidence" I have found to back this bullshit is that puberty blockers "don't significantly impact suicidal thoughts and dysphoria", but why would they on their own? It's only wilfully ignorant people who equate them to transitioning, when they're nothing of the fucking sort), while depriving children of the healthcare they need - two birds with one stone for the the fascist government hiding behind "medical concerns" for people they would clearly rather see dead.
so it's fine for poor people to not only fear systemic violence, but experience it daily, but gods forbid the handful of people in charge of said system who are actively and deliberately inflicting violence and death on millions if not billions of people the globe daily, and for posterity, and for their own benefit, fear some violent self defence..
Violence against poor people: you sleep
Violence against our rich overlords: real shit
The level of bootlicking is gross..
government regulation (and federal prison)
how's that been working out? (hint: it isn't, because capitalism cannot be reformed, by design. And the point of eat the rich isn't to just keep killing them, it's to give them the option to end their exploitative system and give up their power for the benefit of society at large, and when they refuse, because they will, make that decision for them. Once the system is abolished any "heirs", and former rich people who realise they'd rather live as equals to others than die filthy rich, will have no power to take the "top" position again, because there will be no top position, nor will they have any resources to try with).
The article is much better than the headline, and details how companies are trying to make the devices less of an ecological problem. But the framing in the headline just made me think of this.
Oh, ecofascism is very real. Society in general has a massive ableist bias, and the media play a huge part in promoting that. Disabled people and those with long term conditions are often framed as basically disposable. It's everywhere, but it really feeds well in to the often white supremacist and otherwise privileged liberal "eco worrier" movement, but also right wingers who hide their genocidal intentions under a guise of concern for the environment, and even some anarcho-primitivists who insist we "go back to monke" without any regard for the lives of those who depend on technology and modern medicine. The more you look, the more of it you'll see.
I'm disabled myself, in the UK, where the government has already openly set its sites on killing disabled people (tens of thousands already dead in the past 13 years or so due to a deliberately nightmarish claiming system alone, never mind the defunding of our health and social care systems and the innumerable deaths that has lead to), and I can tell you that sadly your fears are well founded.
If you can, find leftist disability activists near you, and see if there is anything you can do to help (it can be anything from donating and spreading info online, to being present at demos and taking other direct action).
Had to deal with it then because it was the only option, and until my late teens the only pc in the house was in the home office and it was never just left running.
Now that near silent machines are easy to achieve though, and my pc is right by my bed and on nearly 24/7, I see no need to suffer like I used to (it's also at least partly a sensory processing disorder thing, because I hear components most people never notice).
I mean, those are just some textbook autism traits (having little to no respect for authority, having no filter, and wanting to be in our own safe space away from people), which is partly why we do struggle so much to find and keep employment (but can do quite well working in an environment that actually considers and provides for our needs)..
but then they’ll ask more and more frequently and get fat
My cat's eating habits seem to keep changing (how fast and how much she eats, and when), but I think I've finally figured out a good way to keep us both happy - weigh out the daily portion in the morning, then split that over morning, afternoon, and evening (or just morning and evening if I forget). That way she's not getting any extra but doesn't eat it all at once then whine at me all day for more, and usually has a little food left in the morning (my "evening" actually being late at night), so she doesn't wake me up as early lol
Alt: “Choose your own radical identity” followed by an anarchist flag with half of it being blank. Next to it are crayons in different colors, referencing different anarchist orientations using different colours to fill the space. At the bottom it says: “A DIY activity book for ages 9-12”
rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
How should I feel about a dying parent who's worthless?
I’m conflicted. I have a parent who’s dying. I feel the void of the parenting I was supposed to receive. They never fulfilled any of the obligations I consider appropriate. I’m a parent, now. They did none of the things I’m doing for my kids....
Donald Duck says eat the rich rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
Teen walks at graduation after completing doctoral degree at 17 (abcnews.go.com)
Emoji Rule (files.catbox.moe)
shared rule is log(rule) (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
100 Days Later, Neuralink’s First Human Patient Is Now Using His Brain Implant to Play Slay the Spire (www.ign.com)
New England stone walls lie at the intersection of history, archaeology, ecology and geoscience, and deserve a science of their own (www.yahoo.com)
"Don't put garlic in your nose": The dangers of sinusitis misinformation on TikTok (www.psypost.org)
Legitimate interest? (lemmy.world)
I never consent to give my data away or being tracked, but how do you deal with so called legitimate interest? I tried several times to untick them but it is a long list (in fact at the bottom there is a “vendors” link with even longer, much longer list. It took me 10 minutes to get to the bottom of it once)....
Fact: More of us care about climate change than we think. (ourworldindata.org)
Open source e reader (lemmy.ml)
I recently got a Sony prs 600 e reader from 2009. The battery is at the end of its life (It lasts about 3 days with heavy reading, and a couple weeks without reading). No backlight, no Wi-Fi, just an SD card that I can load epub files and small PDFs. The screen is slow and the contrast isn’t the best. The “touch screen” is...
Mark Cuban is ‘proud to pay’ $275.9 million in taxes (www.cnbc.com)
Rule (files.catbox.moe)
alt text: "stop normalising the grind and start normalising whatever this is" above a painting of a forest where two bear cubs are up on their hind legs dancing together and two other bears are chilling under a tree watching them
World’s oldest living conjoined twins die in Pennsylvania, aged 62 (www.theguardian.com)
Lori and George Schappell were joined at the skull with separate bodies and lived on their own since the age of 24...
‘My cast and crew’s safety kept me up at night’: why a queer Ghanaian film may never be screened (www.theguardian.com)
Joewackle J Kusi was finishing his film Nyame Mma when an anti-LGBTQ+ bill was passed, bringing the threat of prosecution for those ‘promoting’ queer stories...
rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
Best place to buy btc?
It seems like everywhere is asking for my ID multiple times and there are multiple international companies involved....
r(at)ule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
Pick 3 Rules (files.catbox.moe)
I’ll choose 3, 5, and 7.
Rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
20 Bucks are 20 Bucks 🤷♂️ (lemmy.ml)
i know the meme is hetero normative buf it was too threatening to conservatism to not post it
Children to stop getting puberty blockers at gender identity clinics, says NHS England (www.theguardian.com)
Confirmation comes after public consultation and decision to close Gender Identity Development Service in London...
1300 Rule (lemmy.world)
Standing rule only (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
Ice Cream Sandwich Rule (files.catbox.moe)
babe you haven't hit your jong rule (lemmy.world)
mastodon rule (files.catbox.moe)
Average mastodon user
Eco-conscious rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
The article is much better than the headline, and details how companies are trying to make the devices less of an ecological problem. But the framing in the headline just made me think of this.
deleted_by_author
job market rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
Role reversal rule (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
choosing a lemmy instance (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
Alt: “Choose your own radical identity” followed by an anarchist flag with half of it being blank. Next to it are crayons in different colors, referencing different anarchist orientations using different colours to fill the space. At the bottom it says: “A DIY activity book for ages 9-12”